Ok 2020. I got it. I’ve struggled, and muddled, and fought against the “new normal” long enough. This year was a teaching moment for all of us. While we are days away from putting it all behind us, as many of us like to say, I think we are on the horizon of realizing who we really are.

There has been no better environment to find out what you are made of than 2020. Who were you before you were forced into quarantine? Who were you before you thought about the air that you breathe? Who were you when you went about your everyday and thought more about the errands that needed to be completed instead of thinking about adversity?

I’ll tell you who I was. I was someone who didn’t truly appreciate my home and my community. I was someone who put off until later the value of spending the time, making the memory and enjoying the sunshine. I was someone who would doubt my own abilities because someone put a thought in my head that said I couldn’t.

This year has been a series of teaching moments, and that alone has been a blessing.

What I have learned this year has been empowering:

• I am married to my soul mate. My heart hurts for couples who have gone through break ups this year. Choosing your life mate is probably one of most important things you will do in life, and (in my opinion) way harder than raising kids. Spending more time than usual together is definitely a test of your relationship. I knew that my husband was this person long before COVID hit, but this year has been strengthening to our relationship in ways that make me excited about the future.
• I have a voice that is unique and powerful. I used to overthink my blog posts, podcasts, emails…you name it. Drafts and more drafts would be constructed before I would feel confident enough to publish. What I have learned this year is that my voice, ideas and messages are not meant for everyone. And that is OK. Those that feel connected to what I have to say are who I am meant to be with and work with.
• There is no roadmap for success. While there are always lessons to be learned from those that went before us, no one has lived and experienced this year. You create your own path, and you make the rules.
• I don’t have a place for assholes. I was amazed at how much I “put up with” from other people. Whether it was the offhand comment, to just being, well, an asshole. I realized that I can’t change the world, but I can change how I react to it. How I show up in the world makes a difference, and has given others the strength to do the same.
• We can create change even in micro steps. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and people’s minds, attitudes and deep seeded systematic racism won’t change in a day. We need to take steps, even the smallest steps forward each and every day to understand, become aware, and advocate for our fellow human beings in these great communities that we call home. I want to live in a world where the color of someone’s skin, the spelling of their name, which gender they identify with, or knowing their background doesn’t even give a millisecond of pause to anyone.

I want you to make your time on this earth the best that it can be. Share your talents with us. Show forgiveness and grace. Walk away from those that don’t serve you, and be a teacher for others to learn from.